Why did this have to happen? Why did we have to lose Hunter? Why was everything going wonderfully and then change? Why couldn’t my body carry my child the way it was supposed to? Why did Heavenly Father give us this trial? Why? My days are filled with thoughts of “why”. I was told this was a fluke and there wasn’t anything I did to cause this, but I can’t help but feel responsible for Hunter’s death. I think many women who have lost a child have thought the same thing. “This is my fault and my baby died because of me.” Everyday I go through my pregnancy and try to pinpoint what I did to cause this. Maybe it was because I forgot to take my prenatal vitamin that one-day when I was late for work. Maybe it was because we moved apartments and I spent days cleaning, packing and moving boxes. I only lifted the light boxes, but maybe that was still too much. I wish I could go back and change things just to see if it would make a difference. There are mom
The Journey of Grief